Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Resolve me!

I've been trying to think of a new year's resolution. I realise that January is more than half over (woohoo!!!), but I'm late for most things so being late on a resolution is acceptable, unsurprising, and even expected.

I was strongly considering giving up pizza for 2012 and then realised I already ate pizza in 2012. On January 1st. I made it an entire 17.5 hours into the new year until I broke a (potential) resolution that I had been thinking about but forgot when the important test came. Thank God I'm not a smoker considering I can't even quit something that doesn't have addictive properties.

I toyed with the idea of eating properly. You know, using a fork or spoon instead of my hands or feet.


Exercise more is common, but I don't really feel like that should be a resolution for me because it's boring. Plus I already am a rather active person and don't enjoy just sitting around. Last night and tonight being exceptions due to external factors. Actually, due to the internal factors of not feeling super well.

Another new year's resolution I have highly considered is the goal of being on television. It doesn't have to be anything significant, I just need to be able to identify myself somewhere on the screen.

How I Will Get on TV

  • CBC Reporter - Le boyfriend lives with a CBC reporter. I'm sure he will eventually need extras or an opinion for something. I would be good for weather stories as I prefer to describe weather in terms of how it feels or how it makes me feel. Examples: "Shoot me in the face" is MacCode for "it's snowing a lot and I had to walk somewhere but it's not snowing enough that work will be canceled and my boot is leaking." "It's like being stabbed with needles in the eyeballs" means there is precipitation mixed with some form of ice and it's awfully windy. "I'm so happy!" means it's sunny and I'm sweating and rolling around on the grass in my front or backyard.
  • Work - Sometimes it's a slow news day and something we do is determined to be noteworthy enough to share with the rest of PEI THE WORLD. I've been quoted in the newspaper, surely being on television is the next step. In fact, it's one of the reasons I keep make-up at work. That and freshly applied make-up doesn't always react well to walking or biking to work in most types of weather.
  • Win something - This strategy came to me at a hockey game the other night. The 50/50 total value was climbing, climbing, climbing reaching a point that the winner would get around $2000. I bought tickets because I was actually quite sure I would win, make a small speech and thank "the man above" (person doing the lighting), and get on television. Unfortunately I didn't win the draw so I was unable to see this plan to fulfillment. Now, to win something of value.
  • Go to the gas station - One morning the price of gas changed - I think it went down. My mum was at the pump trying to pump gas (it had been awhile) when she was approached by someone from CBC. Mystery Reporter asked if he/she could ask my mum some questions and Mama said yes (like me, she wished to be on tv). Unfortunately her response was not aired; one can only assume her opinion was wrong and not supported by the CBC. The Canadian Broadcasting Corporation is not the voice of the people.
  • Right place, right time - hanging out in frequently filmed locations, such as the province house when the house is in session.

In case this doesn't work, my back-up plan is to learn how to suddenly turn from skating forwards to skating backwards, and to be able to stop on the side and spray ice shavings up from my blades. So far zero progress has been made as I skipped skates on Monday and Wednesday. Apparently setting goals and resolutions really isn't for me.

New resolution: think of resolution for 2013.


Anonymous said...

I agree; my opinion must have been wrong or simply not very interesting. BTW did you meet the Kellys?

Anne said...

I was on Korean TV this week. A program called "Brain Garden" apparently (how awesome is that!?) They came to film my supervisor in the lab and I sneaked in. I'm sure it's only a short step to a career as a supermodel in Korea...

So, feel free to come hang around our lab as another step in your plan to be on TV!